New Year Resolutions, hah!

My parents just informed me that they're leaving for Texas today and I have to take them to the airport. I'm really glad they informed me I'm going to be alone for a week a day after Christmas three hours before they have to leave... that was sarcasm by the way. Whatever, I'm going to be working 90% of the time anyway so it's not like I'm going to be home much.

I'm also really bored right now, so I've been thinking about the New Years resolutions I'm going to be breaking. So far I've come up with:

1. Work out atleast twice a week.
2. Stop drinking so much soda.
3. Lay off the chocolate.
4. Restrict shopping expenditures to a maximum of $50 every two weeks.

This is really how it's gonna go:

1. Work out twice a month. Maybe.
2. Cut out at least one can of soda a day. Maybe.
3. Not even going to happen.
4. Restrict shopping expenditures to a maximum of $100 a week. It's a habit alright?

I know it sounds horrible, but I'm being honest with myself. I've never been one for restrictions or rules. I usually break them if I cant find a way to bend them. It's better to ask forgiveness than spend the rest of your life regretting never having done what you felt you had to apologize for.
Now I get to go sign up for classes for this semester.
I'm so over school.

bah humbug.

I really wish I could go back to the time where Christmas was fun and happy instead of stressful and anxiety-ridden. I guess thats all part of growing up, but you know what? Thats lame. Is this how my parents felt when December rolled around -- all anxious and stressed? There isnt one place where I havent seen the effects of this season. Its at work, it was at school, its at home, even my friends are more high strung than usual (which is saying a lot because they're typically mellow and relaxed).
It's so frustating because all I want to do is enjoy the one break I've had in 8 months. Yet, here I am stressed out over work, bills, and how I'm going to afford to pay for the gifts I want to get certain people and the gifts I feel obligated to get other certain people (because they've already gotten one for me and I wasnt planning on getting anything for them).
Merry frickin Christmas.

ps: I really do hope it gets better, for myself and everyone. I hate feeling like the Grinch.

Dear winter break,

I'm glad you came because if you hadn't, I was about to burn out.

J'adore votre ensemble cherie...tres parisienne...

You know me and clothes, so you can probably figure out that I'm completely in love with this look. It makes me wish I lived somewhere cold and rainy. Oh, le sigh, soon (I hope)...

yeah, I know..

yes, it has been forever and I apologize. A lot of stuff has gone down recently and I dont know whether I've handled it well or not. I'm sure it's subjective but, honestly, at this point I'm leaning towards 'not so much'.

1. That apartment I was so excited about? Yeah, isnt gonna happen. I was going to have two roommates and everything was doing grand, I bought funiture and basically everything necessary to have in an apartment. One of the two girls called me frantically two days ago saying her grandparents cut her loan (they were paying for her school and major necessities) and is now royally broke/fucked. Needless to say she's moving back home to California until her new loan goes through for the Fall '09 semester.
I'm now down a roommate and was supposed to move into the apartment in 6 days in order to get the fantastic discount. I cant find another roommate by the 17th, and while I do have money, I dont have enough to pay a $450 deposit, a $280 move-in cost and then the rent upfront. I would have only had to pay $350 in rent if there were three roommates, but now that theres only two...the other girl cant pay $600 a month until we find a new girl. So she would want to pay less and I pay more. I'm sorry but I cant afford an $800/mo. rent ontop of all the other fees I'm already paying because I got the master (which was absolutely fabulous by the way).

2. Some shit went down the other day at work between myself and one of the other managers and the fool is STILL bitching about it. Now the GM is on the case and is asking questions (because he wouldnt shut up about it to the servers) when I thought the situation had been settled btwn the two of us in the first place.

3. My advisor called me in the other day and told me that the school had changed its qualifications, mid-semester, for their Interior Design program and I'm lacking now in 4 classes on top of the classes I still have to take. Which means...I'm not graduating at the end of this spring semester like I would have. Oh no, I'm having to take an extra semester in order graduate. It sucks because these were classes I would/should have taken my first year, not my last.

Ugh. I'm so stressed out with everything...christmas is coming up and NOBODY has told me what they wanted. Apparently we're doing an exchange this year and I have to get crap for cousins I've never met. I'm sorry, but my money is reserved for family I'm actually familiar with and close friends. My Grandpa pulled the same crap my Grandma would have by making me feel guilty, saying it was her last wish that the family get to know eachother better. I'm not getting something for a cousin, who last I heard, was 50k in debt because he couldnt keep his credit card in his wallet. Thats not exactly how I want to spend my hard-earned Christmas money.
So I've been laying in bed eating sweetarts, listening to PCD's and Taylor Swifts new CDs that I legally (for once) downloaded. Staring out my window at a garden and a brick wall trying to figure out what to do. Though, at the moment, I cant help feeling like that brick wall is somehow mocking me.

happy turkey day!

I hope everyone has a happy turkey day. I'm gonna be working my ass off (not on thursday ofcourse) but tonight for example, then Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Whatever, it's good money...basically time and a half. I need the money because guess what? -- I just put a deposit on an apartment! I move in the 17th of December, buah hahaha. Miss Independent is me!

Ofcourse to say that I'm a wee bit excited might be an understatement (just kidding, its a total understatement). It's The Edge at Lyon's Gate, which is a this stunning luxury apartment complex. I'm in love with it.

yay!

i love midnight premiers...

I literally went straight from work at 11:00pm to the theater to jump in line with the friendlies to see the midnight premier of Twilight.

I loved it. just fyi.

I cant wait!

okay so, who isnt excited for the new Twilight movie coming out the 21st? I know I TOTALLY am!
I was so excited that I went and googled the movie and found the movie soundtrack. I have to say that I am completely in love with Paramore's new songs...oh, I lovelovelove. I'm so pathetic that I even took the day off work to go see the first showing at midnight. I didnt even do that for Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings...not even Star Wars (Gasp!).

so here's a list of the songs on the soundtrack. I know its evil to post and not have links to the songs, I'm sorry.

Muse - "Supermassive Black Hole"
Paramore - "Decode"
The Black Ghosts - "Full Moon"
Linkin Park - "Leave Out All the Rest"
MuteMath - "Spotlight" ("Twilight" mix)
Perry Farrell - "Go All the Way (Into the Twilight)"
Collective Soul - "Tremble for My Beloved"
Paramore - "I Caught Myself "
Blue Foundation - "Eyes on Fire"
Rob Pattinson - "Never Think"
Iron & Wine - "Flightless Bird, American Mouth"
Carter Burwell - "Bella's Lullaby"

I wanna be European.

what the hell? I give up, I'm moving to Europe and making pit-stops at every other country on the way. Seriously, it's so unfair that they have utterly spectacular thrift, vintage, and designer apparel and accessories at their proverbial (and literal) fingertips.

...yeah right, in my dreams.

songs on repeat.

• It Means Nothing - Stereophonics
• Soul Waver - Malika Ayane
• Love Story- Taylor Swift
• If I Were A Boy- Beyonce
• I Dont Live In Dreams - Jackie Greene
• Rehab - Rihanna
• You May See Me - Grace Potter & The Nocturnals
• Love Lockdown - Kanye West
• Satisfy - Vedera
• Its About Time - Barcelona

Winter inspiration

This is truly my fashion inspiration for this Winter. Yeah, I'm talking about Winter already. I live in Arizona, what did you expect? We only have two seasons here, Summer and Winter. The other two arent necessary apparently. Anyway, this lovely lady is from Moscow, Russia and is a hostess. Two things must be going on here, either A.) the restaurant she works for pays EXTREMELY well, in which case I'm learning Russian and updating my passport and visa...or B.) Things are REALLY cheap in Russia, in which case I'm learning Russian and updating my passport and visa.

all photos via (The Sartorialist).

ugh.

Oi, I am sleepy as all hell. This thirty page paper is killing me, I'm about ready to call it quits on the damn thing. Unfortunately I'm too stubborn and I'm planning on finishing it just to spite my professor (aka. Satan). Assigning a thirty page paper on a thursday and having it due the following thursday should be illegal. We should have had a minimum of atleast 3 weeks to prepare and write the paper. But nooo...she had to go and get all pitchfork happy on our asses.

I swear I havent slept properly in oh, say, a week... and thats horrible for a girl like me who needs all the beauty sleep I can get. hahaha.

I am not the happiest camper.

booo...

halloween was a bust.

it was offically the worst day ever and it was slow as all hell at work.

sucky.

ps.
here's a picture of me at work. it's a head shot so deal with it.

screw worth ethics.

I've always considered myself to have a strong work ethic, but this is just way too much. I've racked up 40+ hours this week at work today and I STILL have atleast 3 hours of general studying, a 4 page paper to write (due tomorrow, procrastination much?), 2+ hours of studying for a test in my communications class, and hopefully getting a head start on another paper I have to write...

all tonight. I've also just gotten off work after a 13.5 hour day, just what I wanted to look forward to! Screw my damn work ethic that kept me there all day.

shopping spree

I've decided that I deserve a well-earned shopping spree after these past couple weeks. So I was thinking of doing a bit of retail therapy at Urban Outfitters and this is what I'm thinking of getting after a bit of online browsing:

Kimchi Button Tab Brushed dress - $58.00

Silence & Noise Persephone Tank - $32.00

BDG Flannel Boyfriend Buttondown - $48.00

BDG Shawl Collar Cardigan - $54.00

Ben Sherman Portobello Coat - $198.00

BDG Black and Blue Skinny Jean - $54.00

Frye Andrea Belted Boot - $428.00

Leather Saddle Belt - $68.00

Joanne Woven Leather Bag - $245.00

Grand total = around $1200.00
I talked to my mom earlier about all this and how I didnt even blink as I handed over my credit card. She told me I was nuts to buy all this, and maybe so, but I work my ass off for my money and I've been saving just over 70% of each paycheck since I turned 16. I'm 21 now and I feel just a little entitled to a shopping spree. It's not as if I have one every paycheck, I dont remember the last time I bought something purely for myself and my own enjoyment. So :-P on anyone who thinks this was absolutely retarded, haha.

peace out Az.

I'm tired of Arizona, or maybe I'm just tired in general. Either way I wanna peace out of here, like, pronto. All the sunshine makes me feel like I'm obligated to be "happy" and "cheerful" all the time then when I'm not I'm suddenly a disgrace or something. I'm not a fan of it, I was around 10-13 years ago when I moved here, but no longer.

I'm not used to staying in one place for so long and I'm kind of antsy. I feel like thats the reason why I've made no real, sort of ...progression, with my life.

I think I'd like living in the Pacific Northwest, or Northeast for that matter. Anywhere that had 4 distinct seasons, rains alot, has tons of trees and plant life whose main color isnt brown. I'm tired of brown and sand. Even in Spring everything is brown and looks dead. I've had a lot of people tell me that the suicide rate is higher in those areas because of lack of sun, all the rain, yadda yadda...I happen to LIKE that about the area. I like all the rain, and green, and all the LIFE.

Hopefully I'll be able to move soon, get on with my life, do the things I want to do...

study, study, study. le sigh.

I think my eyeballs are going to fall out of my head. I have been studying since I got home from work today at 4. I even studied at work; I worked from 10:30-4. That's how hardcore it's been today. I am EXHAUSTED and still I study on.

This is page one of four:

example questions (in case you cant see):

3. Explain how rocks respond to stress (include the difference between deep and shallow rock strain).

7. Explain S and P waves and include a sketch of each type. Which of these cannot move through objects without shear strength?

12. What are slickenlines and what do they tell us?

14. What is the relationship between the Benioff Zone and a convergent plate boundary?

17. Describe tsunami wave trains. How many of them commonly occur, how far are they apart (in time), and which are typically the largest?

I even have to draw stuff, I am so NOT in the mood to draw. at all. The really sucky part is that this is part two of my midterm. Meaning that, yes, there was a part one and it was no less ridiculous than this part two. Sometimes I really hate being in college and wish for the simple life of high school. At the time I didnt consider it "simple" at all but, in comparison, high school was a cake-walk. Oh how I yearn for the simpler days...

Halloween Costume:

So I found two witch costumes that I kind of like:

The first is kinda sexy in a cute way, kinda. But the bottom one is similar to the one Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman wore in the Practical Magic movie that I'm obsessssed with.

Opinions? yes? no?

between classes.

I'm hanging out at home between classes watching Queen of the Damned. I remember watching this for the first time like 4 years ago and I've been addicted to it ever since. Stuart Townsend plays a really good Lestat, poor Aaliyah though. She pretty much got the short end of the stick, I think it was really retarded how religious extremist groups were saying how she got her "just reward" for playing Akasha, the queen of the vampires. That was a pretty cruel hearted thing to say about some one who had just died in a horrible plane crash. Like Karma really had anything to do with her death... like her playing Akasha really had anything to do with it.

After this I think I'm going to watch Interview with the Vampire. I'm in a dark, vampire-y, halloween-y mood today. I kind of like it and I hope it continues through Halloween. It makes me feel festive and with the 85-90 degree weather we have right now, I'll take anything I can get. I'm also browsing the internet for good Halloween costumes that I can wear to my boyfriend's Halloween party and at work. My job is actually letting us get dressed up for Halloween as long as it's not too slutty or anything. I'm looking for something Witchy, I'll let you know what I find, haha.

Merci beaucoup.

I would LOVE to have these fall outfits:

Why must they all be so fantastically French? Even senile old people are fashionable in France, how does that even happen? Why, oh why, was I born in the US? If I had just been born in Europe I would have had style-sense imprinted upon me at birth. Now I have to work at it just to make up for my "American-ness".

(all these photos are from The Sartorialist.)

my feet are screaming!

I just got home from work and I think I'm going to make a cranberry chicken salad with wheat thins and then give my feet a good soak.

Also, something I've noticed, is that older women in Arizona are very proud of their boobs. They just let 'em hang all out and everything. I, personally, am not a fan of seeing random boobs everywhere I look. It was kind of an awkward day at work all-in-all actually. This older guy full on grabbed his (much) younger girlfriend's ass right in front of me. Seriously? Was that totally necessary? Yeah sure, PDA is great and all, but in moderation... It wasnt something I really wanted to be witness to, thats not my place. It certainly isnt appropriate for inside a restaurant where there's little kids running around as well. Gag me.

buuutt...thats just me. Anyway, my feet hurt. I thought I'd reiterate that.

Fall Fruit recipe!

Prosciutto wrapped figs stuffed with mozzarella-

Serves 6

The Ingredients:

• 6 slices prosciutto
• 18 fresh black mission figs
• 18 bocconcini

Heat a charcoal or gas grill to medium-high heat (or an oven to 400°). Cut prosciutto lengthwise into three strips. Make a 1” slit in each fig, then stuff with one bocconcino. Wrap with a prosciutto strip and secure on skewer (allot three figs per skewer). Place on the grill (or in the oven on a baking pan) for about 5 minutes, or until the cheese is melted.

Omg, yumm...this would be the perfect appetizer for anything. Hell, I'd make it just for shits & giggles. I cant wait to try this out, I'm doing it today, just FYI. I'll let you all know how it goes!

color, color, color!

I was looking on Domino this morning and I found a really interesting article on Color. A little side note, I'm pretty addicted to Domino so you'll probably be hearing about this particular magazine quite frequently. Anyway, I was looking through their Color Therapy gallery and I found some really interesting stuff. Well, interesting to me anyway...

Here's some of what I've found (but kind of already knew from my classes on the subject):

Red

Is a wonderful color if it's excitement you're looking for. Red typically inspires feelings of [self-] confidence, energy, vitality, courage -- making it a great color for a dining room or any other room used for social gatherings.

I dont know about you all but, in my family, the dining room was always the center of all the action. It was where we all hung out, talked to gether, ate together, and hell, even fought together.

Currant Red by Benjamin Moore.

Green

The color Green helps to promote contemplation, balance, and inner peace, and springy shades can "evoke a sense of renewal". Who wouldnt want those kinds of peaceful feelings when they walk into their bedroom, honestly? With all the stress of our every day life, I think it would be wonderful to walk into my bedroom and have it all just melt away.

Wales Green (headboard), and Pear Green (walls), Benjamin Moore, headboard stencil from Stencil Library.

Blue

Blue makes for the perfect color in a bedroom since it's said to have calming and relaxing effects on people. You could even put it in your bathroom if thats the kind of spa-like quality you're going for. Just be careful not to pass out in the tub (it happens, okay? I've done that before). Also, Blue is great if you have overly rambunctious kids. Just put them in the room for an hour or so with a book and voila! Next thing you know they're out like a light.

Smoke by Benjamin Moore.

Indigo

Hmm, thats not one I hear often when I think of color therapy. But, Indigo is associated with imagination and intuition as well as power and knowledge. So if you're going for the dreamy, exotic look Indigo would be the perfect color for a brave soul.

Pitch Blue by Farrow & Ball.

work in progress.

So I finally decided to start my blog on this site, I still have my other at my tumblr. I dont think I'll ever fully be rid of that one, I'm too attached. But I'm obsessive enough about blogging and writing things out for me to start another one. I also have my twentysomething blog as well for those of you who might know me from there.
This particular one is still a work in progress, I'm (definately) looking for a cuter layout than this particular one but, it'll do in the meantime. I'll be playing around with it so we'll just see what happens, hah. With my luck it'll end up looking like some Monty Python version of Dr. Frankenstein...which would be bad, or good, if you like that sort of thing I suppose.